Lessons from my Jade Egg #2

I thought there was something wrong with me.

I was broken, I needed fixing.  Since having 2 children I'd completely gone off sex and I could;t seem to get on it.  My friends all had babies around the same time and they mostly seemed persuadable back to wanting sex.  Not me.

It felt as if the nerve endings from my heart downwards had been switched off and my whole body was numb.

I became creative at finding way to avoid sex.  The children slept in our bed, I pretended to have my period.  But I knew this could;t go on.  Our connection was tenuous at best, the relationship was floundering, I was depressed.

Before children I was passionate about life and sex - I loved underwear, I worked in fashion, I was enthralled at the joyful, cheeky radiance of life.  Now, I wore only grey knickers with the wrong kind of holes in.  I felt as if my body were dead.  I felt I was neglecting him. I needed to fix myself and fix our relationship and I was on my knees, desperate.  I'd try anything.  So I did - I bought a Jade Egg.

Sonja Lockyer